Have you ever wondered if your body might be trying to communicate with you through different sensations? Your chest feels heavy? Your stomach feels empty? Your throat feels restrained and tight? Those and many others are normal experiences we have that might tell us a lot about ourselves if we listen to them.
According to Focusing by Eugene Gedlin, these bodily sensations are called “felt sense”. It can come as sensations in our bodies as well as images or pictures, for example, a heavy rock hanging under our heart; a tight knot in our throat; or a tennis ball moving around in our stomach. The Focusing process is about getting in touch with our body’s messengers, learning to be with them, and holding a loving space for them. In this process, I surprisingly find that client gets deeper insights and awareness about themselves that we are not able to get through traditional talk therapy.
A lot of times, what I find is that the most difficult part of Fosucing for client is that clients want to avoid uncomfortable or unpleasant felt senses in their body, so they try to numb or suppress it. Perhaps clients have done that in their lives for so many years that it became a habit to disconnect with this natural awareness.
Whether you are used to numbing feelings in your body, or you have already started getting in touch with your body, Focusing oriented therapy can help you deepen that process. There are many times clients come in believing that they can’t have access to their body. However with gentle exploration and practice, they start to connect with it, and those neglected parts in their body, like a wounded child who never got much attention, are very excited to be seen for the first time. In that, clients start their journey of building a trusting relationship with themselves.
In the western world, we are so used to letting our mind and intellect take control . The Focusing process is to reverse that. Our mind surrenders to our body, letting our body tell our mind what we are going through. As a therapist, I guide my clients into a space where they feel safe to connect with their body, I gently guide them to have a compassionate and curious attitude towards themselves throughout the Focusing process. I see myself as a guide, helping my clients to connect to whatever is there for them to discover.
Throughout this process, clients feel safer to connect with their body, embrace more parts of them, and develop a stronger sense of love towards themselves as a whole. Clients often take this approach to practice with themselves at home after some Focusing sessions and have reported feeling happier and that life feels more meaningful to them.
Focusing is not just a therapy modality, but a way of being, an attitude we all would benefit from: turn our focus from external to internal, gentle acceptance to all parts of us, that we are able to see past those labels “good or bad” “positive or negative”, but to just be a loving friend and student to our wisdom within
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